Putting it all out there...

......  So, how did this all come about? Simple... I was miserable! I had never been so uncomfortable in my own skin. I never wanted to go anywhere, do anything that required 'real clothes' or worst of all(ha!)I hated to go shopping -- which I LOVE to do! How did this happen? I couldn't blame it on having a baby, I weighed more now than I did a couple months after giving birth to Easton. I had settled into a terrible routine. Now, Jake is noticing a change in my behavior and mood -- who also has been a TREMENDOUS support system for me through all of this. After what seemed liked months and going back and forth with seeing a doctor about what was going on with me... I caved in.

    This was extremely hard for me. There's nothing wrong with me, I'm just being a baby. I'll spare some of the details... After a couple of visits to the doctor, I was put on anti-anxiety medication(which I no longer take!!)and started on them right away. At first, I thought I was doing 'better' and feeling more myself. Another thing that I thought was great -- no appetite. Hey, if I don't eat food then I will lose weight -- right?? Um, wrong! I started occasionally working out and doing a few things at home. I lost a 5 or so pounds. This was awesome but not enough.

  Here's where my running began.... I started to have a little more energy, I decided to go for a 'run' on the track. It sucked, it was terrible and I barely made it a couple of laps without my body feeling like it was going to explode. Holy crap, I am out of shape!! I kept at it though, running on the track and occasionally the trail  ... Some days I would have a really good run, being able to go a little bit farther and then a few days later I could barely run 50 feet.

  Why? This is when things started to click for me. I still wasn't eating well(maybe a little better)and drinking a ton of pop! ... BUT I started to like running. I had dropped a little bit more weight and I wanted more! I started reading, talking to other people and really researching things. I educated myself on running, exercising, eating properly. So, you mean if I eat better, my body will perform better???? What a crazy thought!!!

Ok, I can do this. I will do this! This will be life changing! Here we go....

-Ashlee